Pull it Forward

On Fridays I enjoy having no appointments, especially as it helps me recall the mission of my work. See post titled Remember the Why. It's important for us entrepreneurs and introverts to recall our mission regularly and then pull it forward into our week.

What's the Plan?

Today is Friday, typically a planning day for me. It's the day I catch up with my communication,  account for my recent appts, look ahead at my next week so I can create a strategy for being prepared for it, and gather information tied to presentation requests. It's a big day full of focused, proactive tasks.

I love Fridays.

I don't mix appointments into my Fridays, for that disrupts the discipline and follow-through of too many pieces of my work. On Fridays I see where my impact has been, I discover what lies ahead and get motivated for future activity.

Yesterday I talked about purpose (Bold or Purposeful?), recalling our talents and desire to use them. If you ask yourself, "What am I good at? What are my gifts/talents?" you get affirmation of value.

But don't stop there. Purpose is strengthened when tied to planning.

Create a system of follow-through so you continue to see your work in action. This leads to a routine that, although inflexible, creates integrity. Decide how often you need to step back for reflection and which questions you will ask yourself.

After I ask myself about my talents and how I have used them, I ask
"What do I need to do to exceed the expectations of others?"

For business' sake, this drives my ability to follow-through with my systems. For relationship sake, this creates interest, respect and leads to trust. For humility's sake, this affirms my purpose.

When do you track your progress and focus on your goals? What's your system? What's the plan?

Introvert Energy Needs

I've been keeping to a disciplined schedule of early morning blogging, exercise and then on to my day of appointments/research/marketing, etc. Add to this the evening networking and then reading for research and that brings the "No, not yet!" response when the 4:30 alarm goes off prior to the same schedule that includes an early morning networking breakfast.

All introverts need downtime. Put networking events and face to face meetings in their schedule, you better also insert time for themselves. Yesterday's schedule left me feeling exhausted by day's end. However, I know that if I forsake my routine of exercise and writing, my day is not given the boost of energy it needs nor do I feel purposeful in sharing my strengths with the world. So my discipline of coaching myself into what I need is key. By end of the exercise routine my step will be quick, my mind focused and my attitude ready to roll.

I've only 2 outside appointments today - which allows me the alone time to be purposeful in planning, taking a walk outdoors to reconnect with nature and build my energy reserve. In 52 years, I have learned my energy needs and what it takes to be purposeful.

For Lawyers - 4 Guidelines for Improving your Professional Pace

Not to be confused with PACE University, whether online or in New York - which has a school of law- or with the P.A.C.E. program of Houghton University, which boasts a management degree for working adults, pace in this blog post has to do with speed appropriate to the moment.

For decades now females have entered the business and professional world thinking they need to increase their pace to keep up with their male counterparts. Whether in the corporate setting or otherwise, there is a sense that a quickened pace rules the culture.

In sales, the driven often rise to the top quickly. One mark of who they are rests with their speed - accelerated compared to others.

Yet pace, in all its NASCAR glory, has little to do with high speed when creating success. Ironically, high speed has many things to do with creating failure.

Grab Baggers

This week I met with a skilled professional who values the art of public speaking, and then in the same breath announced to me that he won't plan his message before he speaks.

Grab bagger is what I said to myself. Grab baggers are presenters who basically speak off-the-cuff, allowing any version of conversation to stear the next point he makes. Grab bagging is one of at least 7 major speaking barrier patterns that produce audience reflections of, "Well she was nice" or "Was there supposed to be a point to this presentation?" or "Did I miss something?" or "Did the original speaker bow out at the last minute?"

This speaker may begin with a question or two for the audience, yet since this conversational element (when well-done, is extremely engaging) can bide time, it hooks the speaker into a pattern of relying on the audience to drive the presentational content. It is the act of a lazy presenter.

Even without audience involvement, the grab bagger may string together a number of points in a topic that are loosely related, expecting that is Good Enough for what is expected on the topic. Without structure and a solid flow of where the points are taking the audience, the presenter has just lost credit with the discerning audience.

Listeners aren't grouped simply to hear a person talk. They want to get something out of the presentation; actually, they'd prefer to get several things. Discerning and professional audiences appreciate the structure of a speech as it lends to new perspective on cause and effect, or appreciated strategy while learning techniques that support it. Audiences like to be given #'d points of assistance, as in "7 ways to turn around a chaotic moment".

Grab baggers haven't given themselves time to prepare. Prepare your speech. Know what specific focus you believe this particular audience will appreciate, how they can possibly benefit from it, what their challenges may be with it and tips in implementing. Create a carefully chosen gift for the listeners. Otherwise, close your eyes and grab at someone else's party.

The Power of UMHH.....

The spoken word is quite powerful. This has been exemplified since the time of creation - "And God said, 'Let it be' and it was. And it was good." Ever since the beginning of time we people have understood the power behind what comes out of the mouth.

Even when what comes out of our mouth isn't words - but gutteral sounds. Like "wha?", "huh?", "Ooooooh", and "umhh". Each suggests emotional response that, left unguarded and unmanaged, defy our ability to appear honest. These expressions fall out of our mouths and lend transparency to our feelings, even (and especially) at those times we seek to express the opposite.

Imagine a board room setting with major players around the table facing a solitary intruder in their space - the sales professional. Although intent on getting agreement, this sales professional has little confidence and feels out of their league. When asked to share the sales pitch, the individual stammers, "umhh" between every phrase, fighting for solid footing yet sensing only disinterest, distrust and denial from those who may actually need the product/solution yet won't agree to it. Why? UMHH has a powerful impact on listeners.

That solitary word spills out "lack of confidence". It signals emotional overwhelm, lack of preparation, inarticulate expression and therefore propels an immediate action of CLOSED listening. The more the speaker works to create trust and interest on the part of the listeners, the more the listener confirms the attitude of unwillingness to pay further attention.

Ever used the word? If so, notice the times. Perhaps your time was when you were called on the carpet for an action less-than becoming. Maybe you were guilty. Maybe you were ambushed. What first came to mind was, "Uh oh, I'm in trouble."

Maybe the time was when you were in front of a group, nervous about speaking, nervous about saying the right thing, or nervous that you don't look good enough. It's usually self-doubt moments that lead us to use the word.

Eradicate UMHH. It is a killer, and a powerful one. It stops the results you are after by inspiring listeners to not give you an opportunity. It damages your reputation, creates conflict and destroys credibility. There is too much power in that one little word that will lead to damage you don't want.

You can eliminate these outcomes simply, but not easily. This is a habit that's hard to break, but guess what? You want to break it. The first step is the hardest in this case. Instead of opening your mouth at those critical times, keep it closed. That's it. Just keep your mouth closed. Maybe it's time to continue listening. Definitely it's time to check your attitude.

Polishing Your Act

My father had a regular routine on the weekends, about monthly, of polishing his shoes. Perhaps since I'm a process-loving person, I enjoyed watching this routine. It started with setting up a space for several pairs of shoes to sit - whether on the floor in front of him while he sat in his favorite chair, or on an ottoman in front of him. Next, he pulled out the appropriate colors of shoe polish - usually black, cordovan and maybe dark brown. Next came the polishing cloth and brush as well as a soft rag.

Dad always began the process by dusting the residue off each of the shoes with his soft rag, prepping them as the shoe polish directions state - "Apply to clean shoes." Next, he would dip his polishing cloth into the appropriate polish color, swirl the color onto the shoe from heel through toe, side to side, carefully applying along the edges, through the tassles or among the shoe lace holes. Carefully inspecting his work for thorough coverage, he would then set down each shoe with applied cream onto a paper towel, aware that the shoe polish would rub onto the ottomon or floor if not protected. Since the "setting" process takes several minutes, his attention to many shoes at once usually allowed him to make good use of his time. Once he had polished 2 sets of shoes, the first was now ready for buffing.

Whether his shoes were patterned or smooth was the deciding factor on using a brush or a rag for the buffing. Although he could buy a rotating buffing brush, Dad preferred the manual approach of "elbow grease" to do justice to the polishing effect. There's much more pleasure through the process when applying our own pressure than relying on the mechanisms of a tool.

Today I help individuals polish their act, whether when handling tough conversations, when business building through networking, or when speaking in public. Many of the same techniques we apply that my father taught me through his shoe-polishing process.

When polishing your act, these are the key techniques to apply:

1. Start with a clean surface. In the case of speaking well or having confidence in yourself, this means begin with an open attitude. An open attitude accepts feedback and allows it to stick.

2. Apply the soft rag to remove the dirt - don't be too hard on yourself when you see problems. Simply rub out the flaws and move on.

3. Choose the appropriate tone for the impact you want. Address the circumstances with humility, curiosity and enthusiasm. Whichever makes sense.

4. Uncover the barrier patterns that stand in your way. If you need to remove some rough edges, dig deep to do what is necessary. Get real about them. Then break them down. Like dirt on shoes that makes the polish mar the effect,these patterns will continue to hold you back until you break them down.

5. Allow the polishing process to take time to really set well. Plan what to focus on, prepare the steps, and then practice.

When you create polish, not only your shoes shine, your spirit does. You have a slight dance in your step as your soul connects to a more purposeful way of being. When you are polished, you definitely put "your best foot forward".

Mondays - in the rough

Over the weekend I saw a video of a country recording titled something like, Who are You When I'm not Looking? Really great perspective on the fact that most of us are slightly different in public than we are on our own. This leads me to today's topic - Monday behavior.

Keeping the same theme in mind - behavior change at key times - on Mondays all of us who work are just a bit different. We begrudge the fact that we must get out of bed, that the weekend still calls us to reflect on our freedom yet Monday's call is tugging at us. Like a diamond in the rough, our week will develop its quality based on the steps we take on this most important day of the week. The day we are called to atone for our own discipline.

If there is any day to jump out of bed, it is Monday. This is the day our character calls - the day our actions speak the most regarding our sense of duty. Without early action on Monday, the rest of the week lacks focus, lacks motivation and lacks results.

Carve your progress deep through Monday and that diamond in the rough will have a more polished, more pure result. By Friday, if not Thursday, the results will show.

For me, discipline comes in the form of exercise routine, planning, followthrough and commitment. My alarm goes off and I allow myself 2 snoozes - that's a Slow and Steady person's most comfortable time. More than 2 and I just get grumpy. That 3rd snooze calls me out to feed and litter cats, get into my gym clothes, grab the Ipod for my morning dose of great rhythm and get out the door.

If I return from the gym to sit down in front of the news, I relax. That's a problem. I must get into the shower, get into my clothes for the day, eat a good breakfast and then stay moving. This pattern allows me to chisel through that diamond in the rough. It keeps me disciplined and in keeping with my work ethic. If I can perform this way on Monday, the rest of the week is on par. By Tuesday morning I'm remembering what worked the day before, my body is resuming the pattern and my mind accepts it.

How many diamonds can we carve out in a month to a polished, shapely condition? It all depends on Monday. Set your sights on creating discipline that day and you're on track to managing yourself and stone-carving with the best of them!

How Do You Manage?

Many of us are entrepreneurs, or working from home, or business building and enjoy having freedom within our day. Perhaps we are out and about while networking, or we can adjust our day to handle a visit to the veterinarian, or can adjust our direction with ease because we are the one calling the shots.

And with this freedom comes the need to put structure into an otherwise unstructured environment - otherwise we get little accomplished while constantly striving to put out fires. So how do we do it? How do we focus on the important things in our day, our week and our month while juggling all the balls related to our responsibilities?

For one thing, it requires discipline.

If we have to create consistency in our processes, we must make some decisions about how to approach things for best results, then do it the same way time and again. Tracking our consistency gives us the ability to measure our results, and to see what patterns exist when we don't get what we want. This consistency is an act of discipline and focus.

I have read about a new diet that will allow me to control my waistline. In this diet I have choices about what to eat, 6 times daily. Yet once I choose, I am instructed to not deviate from these 6 menus each day, but to hold tight to them for 2 weeks if I want to see results. The philosophy is, with more choices, we make mistakes that throw us off from our desired results.

Although I love choice, I selected my 6 choices and then discovered the thrill in knowing all I had to do was committ to them to get my desired results. Discipline around a few things vs. discipline when being overwhelmed with many choices is much easier to manage.


I run accountability groups for business owners and professionals who want to report the results of their commitment to their goals. What they love about these group meetings is they get to hear from a few individuals, like themselves, who are neutral to their choices yet who care about their results. The discipline involved is showing up for 2 hours monthly to share how business has been going and help each other over the barriers to growth. Yet once each member shows up, he/she is so energized by the brainstorming and ability to relate, that the level of success explodes.

How do they manage showing up for 2 hours to work on their business when it means pulling away from working in the business? Their motivation around the results drive them to be disciplined. Consequently, once they return to their office environment, they have the energy to accomplish things faster than they would have, had they stayed. It's a win/win.

All this comes from being willing to ask for help, consistently showing up to get the benefits, and they move forward as a result.

In summary,
1. Ask for help
2. Use discipline to commit to it
3. Consistently focus on the goals

If you don't have a small group of neutral yet interested parties to help you manage yourself, let me know. We may have a spot for you.

Positively dripping!

At least twice this week I was caught in moments when time stood still.

Just a few hours ago was the most recent, and because of that it finally dawned on me I need to reflect on this. I need to find out what's going on, plan to get more of it and put these moments to use!

Here's what happened:
Each moment when time stood still I fell into useful sites (blogs, videos, tweets) that echoed strategies or tips or ideas I've been churning around in my head. Yes - it's the truth.

One has to do with blogging to get business. Not about writing about it, but about positioning oneself in key ways with content (free and very useful to readers) that adds huge value and repeat traffic. About generating mailing lists within the blog template. (this one I need help with - can't figure out how to synch this with Blogspot) And also about developing relationships with readers individually to lead to future business.

Over the past few weeks I keep looking at my Blog following (20) and realize it's a pretty small following for what I invest in to write. What to do about this....that has been my dilemma. Now I'm offered a strategy and didn't hear myself ask for it! That made time stand still.

Another time I fell into a networking member's website after getting an invitation to spend the day with them. To explore more of what type of work they do before I spend time with them, I went searching at their website. Once on the site I opened a link that led me directly to a presentation my friend both video- and audio- recorded. I was very interested because it was about effectively communicating complex information. That has been a new client need - effectively communicating complex messages.

What I saw demonstrated is similar information I extol in general terms. Yet their work took it steps further with specific examples that made my mind positively drip full of ideas! Now I can turn this approach into useful coaching for the new client as well as for other audiences, both general and specific.



Immediately I pulled out one of my Staples legal pads and started translating the concepts shared into practical examples I can use to any audience I present to. Incredible! It's the format and approach I've been needing. I can't believe I didn't think of it, yet once I saw it my mind couldn't stop! It was almost 5pm and yet I kept at it, not even thinking of Beer:30 until a good hour later.

In cases like this, when the stream of applications to my business is endless, I'm not trying to wrap up my day, nor nosing through the cupboards and refridgerator looking for a worthy distraction. No - I'm engaged.

I must interject right now what led me to each of these fantastic mind bridges. I was searching. Discovery is such a healthy, natural activity for us, that when we allow ourselves to discover, we are bound to find useful, fun, relevant material that we sink our brains into. We allow ourselves to attract that which we need.

And I have been needing new fodder for creative ideas. I've been looking for ways to upgrade my tools and coaching strategies, my methods of getting OUT THERE. So I began by scanning topics put out there on the web (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other mediums). This is time well-spent.

Once I am in moments like these described, I furiously write to take notes, to apply to my circumstances. I write out onto my action lists enough info to engage me later, so I continue bringing myself back to the notes and ideas until I've applied them into my routine. That follow through is important. I'm a slow and steady gal who gets tapped out if I try to complete the task all at once. Knowing that my mind was dripping, I disciplined myself to follow up in small bits.

My lesson is learned. For instance, I am scheduling regular discovery sessions throughout my week. Exploration takes time, takes discipline and also is enjoyable. So why not plan for it? That's the lesson I learned. Plan to explore. It's refueling. My mind is positively dripping with ideas!

What if you heard this...

So you're being diligent within your career. You've committed years of your time, your focus and your energy to a particular field of study and set of talents. You burn the candle at both ends. And part of what has given you the successful edge is your willingness to ask for feedback.

You check in as you position yourself for a sale. You check in thoroughly before taking on a new project. You debrief after projects are completed and you continually seek feedback from peers on best practices.

You are a visionary, strategizing toward your end result with plausible goals, taking steps to achieve them. And you are ready to reach for that next level. So you ask a key question of those you're serving:

What can I do better?

Answers cater to the insignificant yet customer-centered tweaking common to many service providers. And then comes another:

If there is one thing I would suggest, it is to be more businesslike.What followed was an assortment of examples, many solid and logical.

What would you do if you heard this?

Like most of us, you may first consider the source and then determine the appropriateness of the comment. Secondly you may question the meaning of the word "business-like" and compare it to the frame of reference of the source. And then you may even give thought to the ways becoming more "business-like" can enhance your value for others.

All emotions aside, you asked for feedback and this is what you got. Feedback, that source of information that without asking for you may not have heard, is some of the most important pieces of information we use to grow by.



Hopefully what you do next is become more businesslike.

In a Slump?

Here it is the day after a long weekend, and if you're like me, you forgot something big time.

You dragged your tired butt out of bed (not because you didn't sleep - you did), after hitting the snooze 3 times. You grumbled about the early hour, the desire for more sleep and then you slowly got over it. Slowly.

All weekend you enjoyed hanging out, reading good books, mingling with friends and drinking a few brews. You got to bed early, sometimes even napped. Yet still your tired butt was slow to respond to the weekday alarm. What's this about?

Yes, the above is all about me. No doubt you were better than that. No doubt you heard the alarm and it had only ring once to get you up and moving. No doubt you smiled, stretched and said to yourself, "YES! I finally get to be responsible again!"

Okay, so that was tongue-in-cheek. The point is, maybe you didn't forget what I forgot.

The way to begin the week is with the end in mind. That pulls me up, straightens my back, adjusts my eye level and gives me a shot of adrenaline I don't usually get when starting my work week.

When I don't control myself, I forget to focus on what I've already done and how excited others were when I completed those things. And when I forget to focus there, I also forget the enthusiasm that goes with doing it again. When enthusiastic, my head is up, my pace is quicker and my mood is bright. But without this focus, I go into self-doubt, hesitant about my action plan and resistant to moving forward. My head droops.

See comic again.




Comfort zones suck us in. And if we've been there for awhile, they really start to cement around us. Like my weekend. I am usually a workaholic, yet last weekend I did little activity - and comfort sucked me in! I took the opposite extreme. Whereas, (gosh that sounds like legal jargon) had I simply reviewed my successes from last week - article someone wrote about me for the Cleveland Examiner, the announcement that a local business networking group is honoring me for the month, my prospects that sought me out and the upcoming appointments I have for this week, I should have flown out of bed.

Tonight I am starting a new practice. Before reading in bed I will review my successes and what I'm anticipating. I can't afford to waste time any more. I don't have 1000 years ahead of me to live my purpose. All I have is today. All I have is right now. This hour. This moment. No more putting things off.

Hold me accountable to this one, readers. By this weekend I will see the time I used was on controlling myself. I will face those emotional triggers in my head that force that voice saying, "You don't really have to follow through with that step yet" into the back depths. Instead I will say, "Get it done!" I will be motivated. I will notice that it takes even less time to accomplish more. And I will enjoy seeing the results.

June will have many appointments, 4 new clients, 2 new speaking engagements, and so many opportunities I will simply have to turn some down. I will get to be selective.
Then when my alarm rings I will arise with gusto knowing I get to be in control of my own life, my own business, my own opportunities.

Goodbye to slumps and hello to Pogo Sticks!

Cancellation

Because I have so often stepped into an airport in search of a screen detailing flight status updates, I can relate to what people go through when they realize what they expected to happen was cancelled, forgotten or even ignored.

As kids we fear whether our loved ones will forget our birthday, let alone not give us what we most want. Showing up to give us support is key.

Yet when we turn into adulthood, we see the problem persists. When we arrange a time to meet someone for lunch, coffee, make an appt to see a service provider or schedule a time for an interview, with that comes a level of expectation around follow-through. Not only for us - for them as well. We have set aside time in our day, we may have also deferred time from someone or something else to schedule the agreed-upon appointment.

As a result, no-shows are irritating. They are actions that speak to our character. Certainly life gets in the way adjusting our focus, slowing us down or giving us momentary lapses. Yet today's technology allows for life to get in the way without a character flaw arising.

Phone calls made out of respect to those awaiting our presence demonstrate vulnerabilty while representing respect. Yet not all offenders follow through with these common courtesies. We wait, we wonder and no connection is made. Finally, we make the decision to place a call, to leave the location or to give up on the promise made.

Cancellations aren't all bad. Yet when they happen with regularity, we begin to question the character of those not showing up. Especially when no connection is made.

From my own experiences, I will give anyone the chance to make a mistake. Yet more than one starts to grate away at the trust I had in them. And without trust, the communication that follows is just as questionable.

Much worse than a flight cancellation which is usually a safety precaution, one that happens without regard to the others involved is disheartening. It's the first step toward discomfort with that individual.

The Weak Get Going

Maybe it's because I used to teach and my day ended before 3pm. Or because I'm ADD. Or because my energy is low. When it gets to 3pm or so I also want to move on. To get going - away from the task at hand.

It's like when I'm on a treadmill. I get to a certain point when I'd like to just get off and end the routine. Yet persistence gives me a sense of pride, especially when my body is now acclimated to adjusting and then giving just a bit more stretch. And it feels good.

I guess I get too antsy for my own good. If I've not moved around, I need to stand, stretch, and then go back to the task at hand. As I develop discipline in seeing a task through, I appreciate my stamina. And that leads to confidence in my ability to accomplish things that require endurance. I like that. I develop my capacity to give, to think, to stretch, and new horizons lay out before me that motivate me to make further progress.

When the going gets tough, it's the weak that get going. They're the ones who move on. Who have little to show for their efforts at day's end. They're the ones who complain at the end of the month. Yes, that's often been me. But today, I'm persisting. I'm staying motivated, because tonight I deserve to celebrate - not just crash. Crashing is for those who give up.