Could you just quiet down?

We introverts have an internal meter that automatically kicks into gear in public spaces. It is a mechanism that alerts us to behavior insensitive to our temperament - when people are too loud.

I live in a loft downtown Columbus. Like most public housing, hallway noise and noise within the units are apparent to those around me. So out of respect for the other residents, most of the time I keep my noise to a minimum.

I soften my walk on the hard floors, slow down activity in the kitchen when handling pots and pans, am cautious of drawer and door sounds. Talking out loud is usually handled in my "6-inch" or personal space voice.

All this behavior supports my need for quiet, so in reverse, I suspect there are others like me who appreciate the same standards.

Whether we are early-morning or late-night people, there will be the times when noises will escape us. But within a few minutes, I can tell whether someone is respectful of those around them or not.

If not, that's when the common courtesy question is handy to use:

"Excuse me, you probably don't realize I'm having difficulty hearing/sleeping/working with the noise in your area. Would you please lower the noise level?"

No, people will not read our mind. Yes, we can influence others' behavior. When your internal noise meter goes off, wait to see if the noise level persists. If it does, speak up and ask for quiet.

Ease your mind - The Introvert Mantra

Today I defer to the words of others in this post. Introverts, enjoy!

All noise is waste. So cultivate quietness in your speech, in your thoughts, in your emotions. Speak habitually low. Wait for attention and then you low words will be charged with dynamite. ~Elbert Hubbard


unplug iPod
music stops abruptly
cricket song instead
~Dr. SunWolf, professorsunwolf.com


In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in an clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness. Our life is a long and arduous quest after Truth. ~Mahatma Gandhi


God's poet is silence! His song is unspoken,
And yet so profound, so loud, and so far,
It fills you, it thrills you with measures unbroken,
And as soft, and as fair, and as far as a star.
~Joaquin Miller

Silence is a fence around wisdom. ~German Proverb

Go about your way, with quiet.

E. F. Hutton moments

I was born in 1960, so growing up in the 70's I often saw TV commercials capitalizing on the power of E.F. Hutton's people engagement. I guess that meant he was wise, said few words and was deeply respected. He was a quiet leader. If you'd like to have fun with the 1970's TV commercial, click here.

For some reason, many today believe the ones to be respected are the talkers that command attention by taking the floor the majority of the time. They have lots to say and are willing to share. They are loud, have great energy and often know how to make people laugh. They entertain.

What leadership style works is generally different for people, yet one thing is evident - leaders come in all styles. This is great news for the introvert. If we are to advance and excel in our careers, using our strengths is key, and also taking advantage of opportunities to speak. Business meetings, networking events, public forums all offer opportunities for our E.F. Hutton moments.

There's no need to feel we must become extroverted and change our personalities. When we embrace the quiet leadership style, accept the invitation to share, smile while sharing, we gain respect in quiet ways.