2 Tips after a Job Well Done

We are constantly growing or falling backwards.

So  it stands to reason that any time we speakers/performers feel we have done well in front of an audience, whether accomplishing our intent (entertain, persuade, inform, call to action, etc.) or surviving the event unscathed, we are most ready for constructive feedback.

I used to hear from a basketball coach, Don't spend time dwelling on your accolades. That's the time you are most susceptible and vulnerable.

You can imagine the humiliation, when on a basketball court, just after an exciting slam dunk to capture the lead - the momentum in the air is contagious - the scoring team is answered by a slick offense that captures a three-pointer within seconds. Bummer. They just fell backward.

No time for dwelling on the past - stay present to the moment.

Speakers take note: Look around at what else is needed.

The audience will have questions or they will want advice. They have already moved on and want to take next steps based on your topic. Don't dwell on accolades - stay in the present.

Whether a presentation goes well or not, it's time to get constructive feedback.

But we are all most open to it when we believe we are worthy of it. So when things go well, look for ways to improve.

• Where were the areas of relevance
• where were the areas of confusion
• what else did individuals want to know about

After a job well done, there is more work to do. Move forward and grow.

It's Okay to Get Feedback

Several of my clients as well as many in my network are on the speaking "circuit". Whether they are the thought-leaders in their industry or just commonly called on to provide entertaining and informative content, they regularly get on a platform (webinar, panel discussion, presenter, workshop leader) to present content.

One of the ways I have been serving my community is by requesting a chance to observe them. I get new stories for my presentation coaching, I gain respect and admiration for their styles and I put myself in the position to affirm and support them.

In most of these cases I am observing introverts. Is there a reason they respond more willingly? I don't know. I do know they want me in their audiences because they usually want to continue speaking and desire development tips.

Regardless of whether they are introvert or extrovert, it's obvious they want to distinguish themselves from the rest.

Times I have been told to observe folks who didn't solicit it themselves, I have had some pushback. Unless they are really good speakers already. Those who pursue speaking are quick to introduce me as their speaking coach. Those who don't appreciate my attendance tend to create distance from me or not let on to others what my expertise is.

It is okay to seek feedback. Especially when you know you will get better, but beyond that, when you know not only will you learn something, you will be affirmed as well.

Here's a challenge for you:

Before your next talk, seek feedback. Find someone (or a small group of someones) willing to listen and observe. Ask them what they liked and what they suggest. You will gain, immeasureably. You will be affirmed, inspired and motivated.

It's okay to get feedback.

Performance Reviews - they are worth a speaker's time

Thanks to a class I am taking through the National Speaker Association, I have returned to the practice of asking for feedback at the conclusion of each of my presentations. NSA highly suggests using a form of evaluation, suggesting we speakers craft our own form with the intent to get specific feedback beyond a rating or checklist.

Usually I know the tone these evaluations will take by the time I am 2-3 minutes into my presentation, let alone by the time I close. What I don't know is the specifics. And that's what matters. Sure, evaluations can affirm our sense of value, yet they can also offer insight with suggestions designed to encourage and expand our ideas.

Validation or Education - Which feedback do you want?

We watched her struggle through her presentation, rambling on about the points she thought she should make, voicing thoughts and finding examples, yet not sold on anything herself. Her stream of consciousness speaking, evident by her inner-focus and demonstrated by her commitment to talking through her thoughts, gave her the chance to produce some poignant, insightful remarks. But she didn't know this. She was still digging, still trying to clarify her message.

She sat down, crumpled in her chair, glad to be finished.

We applauded, knowing she needed support. Yet what we were all wondering about is, who was going to tell her how to pull these thoughts all together? How were we to offer the assistance she needed?

The Hardest Part is What We Crave

Where I grew up in Findlay, Ohio is a pizza parlor that was the first in the area - Jac & Do's. Their thin crust pizza with ground beef and cheese is the best! You can roll the tiny square-cut pieces right into a roll and pop them in your mouth - so delicious! With a pitcher of beer, it's the destination place of almost the entire community!

Lately I've been craving pizza, so yesterday when I attended a luncheon to preview a presentation of a local contestant prepared for a national speaking contest and saw that pizza was served, I thought: Oh no. Can I control myself? In front of us were varieties of pizza, including some that resembled the type I used to enjoy back home in Findlay. Messy, ingrediants rolling off, the type you just wanted to make a mess with. What happened was what I had anticipated - I started off with control (2 strips and garlic bread) and then I gave in to it. After two bites I knew I wanted more. So I took another two. And enjoyed it!