This morning I met with a great guy who gives so many people a golden smile, warm support and gentle friendship. Yet he can't get going for the wall.
His values are commendable, his heart in the right place but when it comes down to it, he has mental barriers that block the progress he tries to make on several professional levels.
In his head is the presence of an overwhelming weight of ridicule. It acts like leg-irons gripping his best intentions. From his feet to his limbic center of his head is the resounding, "You aren't good enough! You will screw up!" This holds him fast to his spot while his desire is on success. What predicament.
He thinks and he thinks and he thinks and he thinks....
Mostly what people do when in this mental state is recall their struggles, their faults and their failures. Eventually they need to mask the emotion through drink or physical aggression. And this leads to beating up on themselves, which is something they assume everyone else already feels like doing to them as well, so it's a personally justifiable action.
He wants to advance, to get past the mental block, but he doesn't see his value. He keeps saying, "but,...".
I had a client from the past who was very similar. His answer to most questions was, "I don't know" and then he would ridicule himself. The few times he smiled was when making himself the butt of his own jokes and hoping I agreed.
Ever feel this way?
