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Saturday, May 8, 2010
Learning to recognize stop signs
Sometimes we don't quite recognize important stop signs. Whether it's written in an unfamiliar language or a new color or shape, a stop sign is a stop sign, and therefore we must STOP!
In our daily communication, stop signs are written in a number of ways. We must get familiar with recognizing them and adjust our behavior accordingly. For instance, most of us communicate fairly well, yet we should become aware of 3 indicators of barrier producing habits. In other words, there are 3 stop signs to get familiar with and adjust our behavior when there.
First: When we expect our listeners to have a different opinion. If in these circumstances we respond as we always respond, there is a chance the impact we make will be disasterous. We may either avoid the communication or push through.
Second stop sign: When our emotions are challenged. Now it is possible we will create disaster, it may impact relationship as well. Unless we develop objectivity our decision-making is at peril.
Third stop sign: When risk escalates. At this point our senses are heightened, limiting our good judgement. If we don't stop our typical behavior we may create irreparable damage and regret our actions.
These signs are important to pay attention to, so we develop self-management as well as the savvy to lead and influence others. Through this we are able to speak with confidence.
I know. I am an introvert, someone who often held myself back. Yet I had ideas that needed to be shared, skills with people, that when used, could make a difference. Regardless, for quite some time I held myself back. I assumed people would have a different opinion from me, so I didn't offer mine. Repeatedly I avoided connecting with people, yet when they reached out to me my emotions were challenged. Eventually, it led me to isolation, risking my sense of self. All three stop signs were there, yet I didn't know how to manage myself when I saw them. Unfortunately, this created disastrous results. I lost all confidence.
Today I am glad to say that when any of these signs show up, I can now manage myself. The signs may be spelled out differently, yet there is enough familiarity to me that I know to now modify my responses to adjust.
What a difference being aware of these signs has made.